16 Things I Learned At 16
I feel like 16 was a very formative year for me and as I'm turning 17 in two days(!!!), I thought I'd reflect back and share with you 16 things I learned at 16 (I'm still struggling with a lot of these things but hey, we're learning as we go, right?)
1. People will make fun of you no matter what. You can't please everyone so don't stop doing the things you love on account of other people.
2. What everyone is doing with their own lives is none of your business. You may not agree with it, but it doesn't mean you have a say in it. As Amy Poehler says: "Good for you, not for me".
3. Patience is a virtue. All those big milestones; kisses, relationships, etc. will happen to you at some point or another. Don't rush into them just because everyone around you has already had those experiences. When the time is right, you will know and you'll be glad you waited.
4. You will often need 'a minute'. It's normal to feel overwhelmed by everything and to want to distance yourself from the world. Take a minute for yourself. No one's going to think you're weird or hold you accountable for it.
5. Asking is knowing. Ask people questions. Ask your friend to explain that maths problem you didn't understand. Ask your mom about her childhood. Ask people questions that will make your knowledge richer and your understanding of people clearer. Ask ask ask.
6. Your comfort zone will always be there. You have to make yourself do some crazy things once in a while. It's like jumping off a cliff over the ocean: Deep down, you know nothing major is going to happen but the hardest thing is to take the plunge (Please don't jump off a cliff).
7. With that in mind, you should know when to stop. If you don't feel comfortable doing something, set limits. Don't do things if you're not genuinely okay with them just to please people. Remember that those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
8. You will fuck things up. It's okay. You're young, it happens. You can't beat yourself up forever. Try to do as much damage control as you can and learn from your mistakes.
9. You will meet people who will surprise you in the most wonderful ways. Don't be afraid to socialize; there is no greater feeling than meeting someone who's on the same wavelength as you.
10. Family and friends make the world turn. They're the ones who know you the best and will accept you for all that you are- flaws and all. Never take them for granted.
11. Life isn't fair. Teachers will make your life a living hell for no reason. Classmates will be snarky. Great people will get so much less than they deserve. If you're not okay with it, fight against it (see lesson 16).
12. Never underestimate the power of pampering. Take a bath. Dress nicely. Do your makeup. It's crazy how good that'll make you feel.
13. Parents are right 97% of the time. You will kick and scream that they're being unfair and are ruining your life, but if you take a step back you'll realize they're only doing what's best. I'm sure it's not easy being responsible for someone else. (You need to thread very lightly when it comes to the other 3%. If you throw a tantrum, they'll never take you seriously. Instead, keep your tone calm so they know they're dealing with an adult).
14. Friendships take work. Even decade-long friendships. Especially decade-long friendships. Don't assume that because it's been a long time you have a right to be an asshole to them and they have to put up with it. Believe me, they won't.
15. Listening is so much better than pointless chatter. Don't waste people's time saying stupid things that don't matter. And listen to what people have to say; in restaurants, in family gatherings, at school. Overhearing things is never a bad thing, as long as you're getting educated.
16. You will often be faced with fight or flight situations. You'll want to pick flight. Fight instead. It's much more rewarding (Again, don't take what I'm saying literally. If you're faced with a physical fight or flight dilemma, you best get your ass out of there).
1. People will make fun of you no matter what. You can't please everyone so don't stop doing the things you love on account of other people.
2. What everyone is doing with their own lives is none of your business. You may not agree with it, but it doesn't mean you have a say in it. As Amy Poehler says: "Good for you, not for me".
3. Patience is a virtue. All those big milestones; kisses, relationships, etc. will happen to you at some point or another. Don't rush into them just because everyone around you has already had those experiences. When the time is right, you will know and you'll be glad you waited.
4. You will often need 'a minute'. It's normal to feel overwhelmed by everything and to want to distance yourself from the world. Take a minute for yourself. No one's going to think you're weird or hold you accountable for it.
5. Asking is knowing. Ask people questions. Ask your friend to explain that maths problem you didn't understand. Ask your mom about her childhood. Ask people questions that will make your knowledge richer and your understanding of people clearer. Ask ask ask.
6. Your comfort zone will always be there. You have to make yourself do some crazy things once in a while. It's like jumping off a cliff over the ocean: Deep down, you know nothing major is going to happen but the hardest thing is to take the plunge (Please don't jump off a cliff).
7. With that in mind, you should know when to stop. If you don't feel comfortable doing something, set limits. Don't do things if you're not genuinely okay with them just to please people. Remember that those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
8. You will fuck things up. It's okay. You're young, it happens. You can't beat yourself up forever. Try to do as much damage control as you can and learn from your mistakes.
9. You will meet people who will surprise you in the most wonderful ways. Don't be afraid to socialize; there is no greater feeling than meeting someone who's on the same wavelength as you.
10. Family and friends make the world turn. They're the ones who know you the best and will accept you for all that you are- flaws and all. Never take them for granted.
11. Life isn't fair. Teachers will make your life a living hell for no reason. Classmates will be snarky. Great people will get so much less than they deserve. If you're not okay with it, fight against it (see lesson 16).
12. Never underestimate the power of pampering. Take a bath. Dress nicely. Do your makeup. It's crazy how good that'll make you feel.
13. Parents are right 97% of the time. You will kick and scream that they're being unfair and are ruining your life, but if you take a step back you'll realize they're only doing what's best. I'm sure it's not easy being responsible for someone else. (You need to thread very lightly when it comes to the other 3%. If you throw a tantrum, they'll never take you seriously. Instead, keep your tone calm so they know they're dealing with an adult).
14. Friendships take work. Even decade-long friendships. Especially decade-long friendships. Don't assume that because it's been a long time you have a right to be an asshole to them and they have to put up with it. Believe me, they won't.
15. Listening is so much better than pointless chatter. Don't waste people's time saying stupid things that don't matter. And listen to what people have to say; in restaurants, in family gatherings, at school. Overhearing things is never a bad thing, as long as you're getting educated.
16. You will often be faced with fight or flight situations. You'll want to pick flight. Fight instead. It's much more rewarding (Again, don't take what I'm saying literally. If you're faced with a physical fight or flight dilemma, you best get your ass out of there).
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